Wednesday, November 25, 2009

An Example of Danish Common Sense

A Danish child is put into a government institution at 6 months and is basically kept there as they grow up. Danes believe this is a good thing and think it's normal.

However, I'm not Danish and believe it's the parents' job to raise their children, not the government's. So when the opportunity came to work from home, I took it so I didn't have to keep our son in an institution. I enjoy spending time with the little rascal, it limits his exposure to Danish brainwashing and this also gives him a chance to deal with homework before spending the rest of the day playing. So a few months ago, we withdrew him from the SFO program at his school (SFO is the afterschool institution). This left the Danes at the school very confused. So confused that when we arrived at school this morning, as we do every morning, his locker had been completely cleared out and his name removed.

Evidently, if you don't belong to the government institution at your school, you no longer exist at that school - even if you still go to classes every day and are enrolled in that school.

They got a taste of an American going extremely grumpy this morning and have promised to fix it . . . that's if they can overcome the handicap of having their heads completely devoid of anything resembling common sense and even, heaven forbid, an original thought.

I'm still grumpy . . .

Friday, November 6, 2009

Grumpy Rules!

A study has shown that being grumpy is actually good for you.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8339647.stm

In short, grumpy people are better at decision-making and more realistic than the happy people. Happy people tend to not look deeply into matters and just live on the surface - the grumpy ones think about things and are better communicators.

For once, being grumpy is making me happy . . . take that, happy people!

A Happy Memory

Another nod to K for the idea . . .

One happy memory that springs to mind is a day spent with my son and mom on our last trip back home. My parents live in southern Florida not far from the beach, so of course time would be spent there. We hit this wonderful beach with white sands and crystal blue water. The waves were light and as it was early in the day, it had not yet gotten too hot. Seashells were collected, sand castles built and destroyed - either by grandma, son or by a scurrying crab in a hurry to get back to its hole. Lots of water was splashed by all parties along with a lot of giggles every time a wave hit my son, who was 4 at the time. After a couple of hours when the beach started to get crowded and bare feet was not a good idea on the increasingly hot sand, we left for home. After getting cleaned up, we then went out 'treasure hunting'. In our family, that means hitting antique shops and secondhand stores looking for odds and bits that catch our interest. It's more the time spent together than for anything valuable. My son got into the spirit of it and actually found a couple of books that he liked.

My Best Possible Future

Nods to K for the idea :)

My best possible future would be one in which I live in a small cottage within sight, sound and smell of the mountains, forests and ocean (yes, Maine is one of my favorite places). I'm able to make a comfortable living from my writing - not necessarily millions, but enough to keep the roof over the head, food on the table, kibble in the cat dishes and books on the shelves. My son will grow up in a wholesome atmosphere and become a man who stands up for what's right and just, and not just accept the status quo but work to change those things that need to be changed. There will be time to work on hobbies, evenings spent with family and friends and quiet times spent listening to the waves hitting the shore. I must admit, I'm not one for travel - home is the best place on earth and with such a home as I hope to have some day, I can't imagine wanting to ever leave.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Danish Lessons

My language background consists of 5 years of French during elementary/high school and a year each of German and French as well as a semester of Japanese during college. I loved languages and learning them, especially French. So I looked forward to starting my Danish classes and learning the language of my new home.

Ha . . .

Instead of starting at the beginning with a bunch of other beginners at a set time, I was thrown into a class that had been going for months. There was Danish being thrown back and forth, and me sitting there going 'Huh?' Amazingly frustrating and the little I learned between April and July consisted of my numbers and saying 'Hvad?' I did have an excuse in that I was becoming increasingly pregnant and had morning, noon and night sickness so it was a little difficult to concentrate, but really . . . it was the most bizarre way to be introduced to a language that I've come across to date.

As I was due in August, I was able to take a break from lessons and concentrate on giving birth to a brand new Viking. Meanwhile, I did pick up quite a bit from reading subtitles on the tv and newspapers though my speaking was still very rough. According to the hubs, my American accent is extremely strong and rather funny-sounding *sigh*

So after several months, I was back. New class, new teacher, new experience? Nope, was thrown in and expected to pick up right away what was going on. Not only that, but this teacher loved to ask everyone the most personal questions (Describe your first date, in Danish please - 'Det var dejligt' *silence*) I'm a rather shy, private person (ok, stop snickering) and this just really drove me nuts. But went through a couple of months of that before I needed to stop once again. I had gotten permission to start at a business college to upgrade my skills in order to get a job here. As hubs at the time worked shift work and babysitters were highly expensive, I could now skip the lessons and focus on improving job skills for the next two years.

Skip ahead two years . . .

I can now read Danish enough to understand non-technical items and signs. I can also speak enough to get by when out and about. So it was time to go back to Danish lessons while the job search was underway. But this time, I was not looking forward to it at all. The classroom experiences were highly discouraging but nothing compared to the experiences on the streets of Denmark. Every time I spoke Danish to someone, there would be one of three reactions:

1. Answer back in English.
2. Look of disgust and walking away without saying anything.
3. Look of disgust coupled with a few swear words before walking away.

If I got the first one the majority of the time, then there would be no problem. But I got 2 and 3 most of the time. Well gee, Danish people, thank you for welcoming me to your country. I actually was thinking it was me - was I not smiling enough? was my accent really that bad? did I pronounce the words that badly? did I step on their toes? Though my husband witnessed some of it (and got angry), most of the time I was out and about on my own. Over time it became harder and harder to gather the initiative to learn more Danish. And as luck would have it, the Friday before I started up the lessons once again, I got a job in a company that had English as the corporate language. Yay, no more danish lessons! And considering the reactions I got from speaking it, hardly any incentive to continue learning on my own - why bother if they're going to be rude and swear at me? The French have the reputation of being mean if you speak their language wrong, but they have nothing on the behavior of many Danes. And before I get hate mail, notice I didn't say ALL Danes - there are a few who are actually helpful and have manners.

I wonder if they could clone these special people to repopulate the country . . .

Sunday, October 4, 2009

The First Few Months . . .

When we left the US the day after Thanksgiving, my Danish husband was more emotional than I was - I was actually looking forward to seeing my new home while he was emotional about all I was leaving behind to go with him to Denmark. The first couple of days was a bit of a blur. The trip consisted of a flight to Canada, a flight from Canada to Germany then a train from Germany to Odense, where my husband was living at the time. All this within a 24-hour period and bringing along my two cats. Needless to say, I didn't wake up until a day or so after arriving.

Odense is a quaint little town, lots of history which is one of my interests. My husband played tour guide and we saw quite a bit of the town, even parts he had never seen in the years he had been living there. My first Danish Christmas was interesting, was spent at the in-laws so it was my first introduction to his family. That particular experience most likely deserves a post all its own. To be brief, they're not bad people.

After Christmas, my wedding present arrived from my parents. They had arranged to have all my stuff shipped to Denmark to help me settle in better. The day it arrived was also the day we found out I was pregnant. As this was totally unexpected (I had been told it would be near impossible for me to get pregnant) it was a very emotional day all around. That in a nutshell was my first couple of months in Denmark - was happy, people were pleasant and was looking forward to a bright, happy future . . .

Then came the first signs that something was rotten in the state of Denmark. Governments the world over live and die by their bureaucracy, they can't help themselves, so I wasn't too surprised by the questionnaires and interviews that immigration put us through (where is your spouse as you're filling out this form? what are the measurements of each room in your residence? has your spouse seen your residence?) But everything worked out and my all-important CPR number was on its way. As we had the letter telling us this and what my number would be, we thought no problem getting me to a doctor for my first checkup. Nope, had to wait for the actual card which was still somewhere in the process. As the person in the kommune office told us, 'If everyone in America knew they could come here and have babies for free, they would all come here' Luckily the husband was talking to him, otherwise he might have gotten an earful from me. Because I was a bit on the old side for having my first child and we didn't want to take any chances, we had to pay cash for the first few checkups and sonogram, despite me having that CPR number but not having the physical card. Okay, fine, bureaucrats are annoying but this would be just one speed bump in the road.

Then came Danish lessons . . .

Monday, September 28, 2009

10 Clues That I'm Not Danish

1. I have manners, thank you.

2. I will actually stand in a line and wait for my turn. You are taking your life in your hands, however, if you try to cut in front of me.

3. Pickled herring, salty licorice, leverpostej - these are not edible food items.

4. I don't drink. I don't like the taste or how I feel when I do. Believe it or not, life can be enjoyed if you're not soused all the time.

5. It's my job to raise my children, not the government's.

6. Danish humor is not funny - unless you're Danish. The rest of us just don't get it.

7. Sitting in a chair is not meant to be an endurance contest or a test of how flexible one is. We have one Danish-style chair in our home which is my Danish husband's - you will be in desperate need of a chiropractor if you spend any time in it.

8. When I visit your home, I don't look into everything or wander through all the rooms. (Has anyone else experienced this here or is it special to the people my husband knows?)

9. I don't walk about naked in front of complete strangers.

10. I accept there is a world outside this country and there are actually better places than here.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

10 Clues I'm Still American

Thanks to the Talented Foreigner ;) This will most likely have a midwestern slant to it as that be where I hail from *picks hayseed out of hair*

1. I'm nice. I will hold doors, say 'please' and 'thank you', help someone who looks like they could use a hand.

2. I have a strong work ethic. If given a job, I will actually do it quickly and efficiently.

3. I'm friendly. I will ask you how your day was and actually want to hear about it. I may even invite you in for a cup of coffee and cake even though we've only been neighbors for a day and not for years.

4. I love to read. My home is filled with books covering different genres, fiction and non-fiction. Many of these books have never seen the top 10 of a bestseller list.

5. I have clutter. I collect things that touch me - it doesn't have to be modern or perfect or even part of a authorized collection, but it does need to be kindred. And I will show them in my home on any surface available.

6. I'm not afraid of color. Each room in my home has color on the walls and in the furnishings.

7. My cooking actually has flavor and variety. No one has ever left my table hungry and I've never really had to deal with leftovers despite cooking for twice the people that are physically there.

8. I'm not trendy. I don't need the latest fashions or gadgets. If the tv breaks and cannot be repaired, then I'll get a new one. I will not replace it just because a new version came out.

9. I'm independent. I don't need my government to take care of me or tell me what to think. I'll do that for myself, thank you.

10. I like the fact that people are different from me. They don't need to look the same or sound the same in order for me to accept them. The Vulcan race from 'Star Trek' (showing my nerdiness right there) has a motto: Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations. I believe in our melting pot back home - it makes for a stronger society.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Spider Sweatshops

In reading this article, the first thing that came to mind was thousands and thousands of spiders, chained to machines, forced to spin silk for little or no wages and in poor conditions.

Then came the part about introducing spider genes into cows and goats. A vision of an eight-legged cow sitting in a web strung between trees, looking for a human meal came into focus . . .

An imagination is a terrible thing to have at times . . .

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

How About An Original Idea?

A small rant about Hollywood these days . . .

What's with all the remakes??? News came out today that they are remaking the movie 'Highlander'. Now this is a classic and there was nothing wrong with the original - it's not even that old. This is just the latest in a long, very loooonnnggg list of remakes that are being worked on. Some of the other movies that are being remade:

Total Recall
The Neverending Story
The Karate Kid
Romancing the Stone
Footloose
The Dirty Dozen
Clash of the Titans
The Birds (didn't they learn from the Psycho remake not to touch a Hitchcock movie?)
Harvey
Beverly Hills Cop
Nightmare on Elm Street

All of these are fine just the way they are - people love them as much today as they did when they first came out. So why can't we get new stories to fall in love with?

Hollywood - stop thinking with your wallet and start dreaming again . . . if it's good, we will come.

Why Denmark?

Back when the world was young . . .


Actually it was 2001 when my husband and I decided to marry. However, that wasn't the big decision we had to make - the big decision was what country to live in. You see, my husband was Danish and I was American. Up to that point, I never had any desire to leave the US - it wasn't perfect (nothing ever is) but I was happy with the way I lived. I loved the different cultures available, the beauty of the different parts of the country and the friendliness of most of the people I knew or met. In the months my husband was with me in the US, I introduced him to the country I loved and he grew to love it as well. So that would seem to make the decision easy - we would stay there.

So how did we end up in Denmark?

Hubs had only a handful of classes and a thesis to write in order to finish his master's degree in literature/communication. As it was free and so close to the end, it was a reasonable point for moving here temporarily. He also mentioned the friendly people, the wonderful health care system, how easy it would be for me to adapt to the culture. Of course, all the literature (mostly touristy stuff) I could find about the country seemed to support this. So we came to Denmark for what I thought would be a temporary stay (5 years, max, he says).

How has life been here in the country with the happiest people in the world?

The people marketing Denmark as a wonderful place to live could sell water to a drowning man . . .


Why am I still here 8 years later?

Ask myself that question every day . . .



To be continued . . . (if they don't drive me crazy first)

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

A Simpler Way of Living?

One of the reasons that a few US expats give for moving to Denmark is that it allows them to live in a less materialistic, simpler way than they used to. Why do you need to uproot your family and move thousands of miles to a different country in order to do this? While I knew people who lived for the latest gadgets and toys and status symbols, I also knew a lot of people who lived 'a simple life'. One in which they had time to spend with their families. A house that may not have been the biggest and fanciest, but provided shelter and was filled with laughter and love. A life in which children learned responsibility by doing their chores, and not by having a maid to pick up after them. Family vacations to the local amusement park were more fun and satisfying than trips to a Caribbean resort. People learned to be creative when it came to holidays, gifts or even everyday life. Many of these people lived this way by choice - not by necessity.

My life before I came to Denmark was one that certain people would consider boring. My family placed value on time spent together and learning to do things for yourself, even though my father had an executive position with a Fortune 100 company. I made a lot of my own clothes, cooked from scratch, enjoyed crafts such as candle making and crocheting - all this while living in the US. I've also turned down promotions that would have given me the fancy title, office and huge paycheck but would have left me no time for enjoy family and life. So there was no need to leave my home in order to live differently. This is probably why it seriously irritates me when people say moving to Denmark was necessary in order for them to live this way. You have a choice in how you live - don't blame the culture that you chose a hectic, materialistic life with no time for the ones you love. Millions of Americans have lives that put family and love first ahead of careers and 'things'. And they don't need to move to another country in order to do this.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

What Style Are You?

Interior design is a big passion of mine. Not the minimalistic, modern type of design that reflects an emptiness of soul - but the kind of design that makes one walk into a room and immediately relax, where pets and children are welcome, books are everywhere and who cares if everything matches perfectly. Cottage style is my favorite, along with dashes of country and traditional. I must admit that one good thing from my time here in Denmark has been getting creative in design. Danish design is heavy on the modern with a high dose of black and white. In order to get rooms I love, I've learned new crafts (for example, rug making - braided rugs are next on my list) and how to adapt modern style furniture into something livable.

The Home Goods website has an interesting quiz in finding out what style reflects your likes/dislikes. It did hit mine spot on:

Heather, you are a Country Casual

Your home expresses your open, easygoing approach to life. You love unique finds, and can turn a few mismatched garden chairs or floral teacups into a charming arrangement. You appreciate a pretty mix of relaxed pieces, like painted wood or weathered furniture, lovely florals and other patterns, lots of throws and pillows, mementos and bunches of fresh flowers that give your home a unique sense of breeziness and charm.

You value comfort. Your home is a warm and open friendly place, and you feel happiest when everyone is cared for and relaxed in your space. Elements like pillows, throws, overstuffed furniture, and good lighting set the mood. You may also enjoy layering different fabrics or mixing patterns to create a cozy effect.


So, what style are you?

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Lemons of Life

‘When life hands you lemons – make lemonade!’

Don’t you just want to headslap the person when they trot out that little gem? Okay, so you can make lemonade but it really depends on the quality of those lemons as to the kind of lemonade you’re going to get. The lemons may look perfect and fresh on the outside, but inside they are rotten and wormy – not exactly working material for a drinkable beverage.

The best thing to do at that point is to chuck the whole mess into the garbage and head back to the market. Do your research on what markets would have the best quality of lemon, what do people think about the lemons at those markets, try the lemons at the various markets. You might get rotten ones again; then again you might get some decent ones that would make a great lemonade. The priority, however, should be do you really want lemonade?

Personally, I’m a fan of apple juice . . .